Satan is a Christian!

A. Satan is religious.

B. Satan believes in God.

C. Satan believes in Jesus (Since salvation is based on faith alone (Protestant); then Satan has salvation).

D. Satan believes in all the doctrines that make up soteriology in the Bible since he is portrayed as working against them.

E. Satan is a good friend of God: 1. In the Book of Job, Satan and God were betting buddies who made life Hell for poor ole faithful Job. 2. In Numbers 22, Satan is one of God messenger angles and he acts in accordance with Yahweh‘s will. (Check out the Hebrew here!)

F. The fact that Jesus stated that those who love him do the will of his father (God), than Satan proved that he also loved Jesus as he did the will of God as stated above.

G. Satan has more morals than God himself as Satan has never murdered defenseless men, women children, babies and the unborn as God did in the Hebrew Bible. Now, compared to God, Satan has been an angle of love (Note the objection to Revelation below).

H. Satan has a code of morals and ethics and abides by them as seen in the temptation of Jesus (unlike the murderous Israelite god Yahweh, Satan values life).

I. Satan is willing to be God’s “whipping boy” to allow Jesus to look good. But we should note! Satan has never said he was the leader of the demons. Demons are Gods own creations to affect fallen humanity after their expulsion from Eden and are God’s eternal curse on them. (In the New Testament, the term Devil can mean demons (Mark 1:34, 3:22; Matt. 9:34, 12:24; Luke 8:2, 9:1, 11:15; 1 Tim. 4:1; James 2:19) as well as Satan (Matt. 4:5, 8:11; Luke 4:2,3, 13; John 13:2, 8:44; James 4:7 and so on).

J. The Book of Revelation is a late addition to the Canon objected to as heretical by a number of the Church Fathers and Luther.(1) Fact is, the Book of Revelation late creation (post 90CE) is simply revisionist theology written to shift all God’s historical faults onto Satan.

K. Since Satan can not create anything; the problems imposed by Hell, the Lake of Fire, the Pit
(Rev. 9: 1,2 ) as depicted in Revelation from which stinging the demons come forth (Rev. 9:10), the Beast and the false prophet are all Gods creations and was one reason Revelation was considered heretical which contributed to its late inclusion in the New Testament Canon.

Fact is, the woes in the Book of Revelation are God’s own doing to make him look like a Deity in control (Like the deranged fireman who starts a fire so he can get the glory of being the first on the scene to put it out). In this sense, the self destructive God of Revelation is the same self destructive God in the book of Job who gloried in Job’s suffering to make himself look great!

L. Satan was never hated for what he preached unlike Jesus whose so-called ministry of love went from zero to death in three years or less! The statement that Jesus himself said: “By their fruits you will know them.” Matt. 7:16 - 20 by which Satan’s actions are vindicated while Jesus’ actions definitely are not (Jesus was the “tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire”/ crucified). It’s funny how a man like Jesus, who is said to have loved all of humanity, ended up hated and killed by the end results of his own so called love (Talk about a moral and ethical contradiction)!

M. Jesus believed in and trusted Satan so much that during all three temptations, Jesus followed Satan for 40 days (Mark 1: 13, Luke 4:2) and enjoyed Satan’s preaching (if he did not, why did he hang out with him for 40 days?). In the end, Jesus was as faithful to Satan as Jesus’ own disciples were to him in that Jesus abandon Satan just as the Disciples were to later abandon Jesus: A time when they were needed the most.

N. While Satan is called a “Liar and the father of all lies” the Bible fails to give not one single incident of Satan lying. Even the serpent in the Garden of Eden is depicted as stating the truth while Yahweh lied (The very day you eat of it, you shall die). This serpent in the Garden of Eden has more in common with the medical rod of Asclepius noted for wisdom.

P. Since Satan is a fallen angel, the atoning death of Jesus only benefits fallen humanity and not the spirit world, so just as the Church Father Origen’s belief in universal salvation implied Satan will be given salvation at the last judgment just as all Christians (Commentary on John 32.229f.).

Q. Satan did not create this Fallen World outside the Garden of Eden, God did. Just as God created the woes in the Book of Revelation to sadistically extract prayers and praises for himself, God created the Fallen World to sadistically billed himself up and extract prayers and praises for himself.

R. Sure, God gave his only son to die for a mess God himself created just like God created Satan as his escape goat to blame for his evil side. God uses others to carry the blame for his screw ups.

S. If one was to take the Bible and list all the evil deeds God has done compared to those deeds of Satan, the evil deeds of God recorded in his own word, the Bible, would over whelm any so-called evil deeds of Satan.

T. Finally, since the Bible lists the acts of God as a witness to his many evil and sadistic deeds, by such a Biblical witness, Satan is indeed a Christian!


(1) The Book, which was probably known to Papias is already ascribed by Justin to the Apostle John. This attribution was accepted in the Muratorian Canon and by Tertullian and Hippolytus and generally followed in the west.

In the East it was widely rejected, most notably by Alogi, Dionysius of Alexandria (who argued against its Apostolic authorship on the ground that it differs in style and content from the Fourth Gospel and believed it to be the work of some other John). It was also rejected by Eusebius. Some Eastern Church Fathers and Councils (Cyril of Jerusalem, the Council of Laodicea, john Chrysostom, Theodore of Mopsuestia0 did not include it in the Canon. It was also omitted originally from the Syriac Peshitta and the Armenian versions.

(Further discussions on the theology and canonical status of this Book can be found in the commentaries of R.H Charles (2 vols. in the ICC), David Aune’s 3 vols. in The World Biblical Commentary or Bruce Metzger’s The Canonization of the New Testament)

1 comments:

Harry H. McCall said...

While I was composing this post, I see where John has decided to stop all outside comments. In view of some of the attacks on John’s character, I can’t blamed him! (If one could earn salvation by bloging, John would be a saint!)

So now Christians, embrace you new brother in Christ; Satan and depart in peace!